Words like rainbows

It’s funny who she ended up texting, and who she never heard from.

It’s funny who told her they thought her a best friend, and who never said anything.

It’s funny.

But not in a ‘oh how peculiar’ way.

Funny in a ‘hahaha’ way.

Very funny indeed.

They sit, not quite side by side.  

And the gap between them speaks more than anything they say.

And maybe I sound heartless, but once you’ve been in battle, the idea of war loses it’s glory.

Dear Dennis,
I still think of you.

Dear Dennis,
dear Dennis, I still think of you.

Dear Dennis, dear Dennis,
I still think of you
I keep your photos in a box
Each one still in its frame 

(Source: propernarrative)

I miss you.

And they say she’s in the class A team, stuck in her daydreams, been this way since 18

Anonymous asked: what is the significance of 'today'? or tuesdays?

I assume you’re asking in response to that last post I made?  It isn’t so much about the day I posted it but more about not putting things off.  Instead of continuing to tell myself “one day” I figured I might as well ditch that and replace it with today. 

For example, One day I will learn how to properly make my mum’s cheesy orzo becomes Today I will learn how to make my mums cheesy orzo.

Shit.  Now I have to go learn that recipe.

One day Today

Melancholy.

How I wish you were here

We’re just two lost souls, swimming in a fish bowl, year after year

Running over the same old ground, what have we found?  The same old fears

Wish you were here.

He said he wanted her to be cute.  That he was tired of watching her be cute with other people.  That he promised he wouldn’t make fun of her for it.

She wondered if “I miss you” was cute.  Or maybe it was needy.  She almost hit send.

She opened her book instead.

It’s like when I stopped drinking coffee for that stupid fucking bet I did.

At first, it’s not so bad.  Most people think that the first days are the worst, but they’re not.  They’re not because in the first days you can still remember the taste.  You can still recall it’s rich aroma and heavy after-taste.  You can still feel it’s warmth, and the creamy colour when you add milk.

No, it’s not the first few days that are the worst at all.  

The worst day was the day before I got to drink it, because it builds.

It starts as something small.  You don’t remember exactly the level of bitterness.  And then, then as the days build, you forget more and more until suddenly all you’re left with is this notion of a memory in which all you really remember is that you used to love it and that you’re supposed to love it still and therefore you miss it with this horrible ache because for the life of you you can’t quite remember what it is you miss about it.

And that’s exactly what this is like.  

Except not with coffee.

I know you’ll be upset.  I know you’ll be upset because I would be upset.

But I want you to know that none of this was my decision.  Well, in a sense I suppose I made my decision, picked between you two.  

But it wasn’t ever about that.

And I hope you can forgive us.  Because it isn’t about you.  And it isn’t about anger or hate.  It’s about love.  It’s about saving friendship.  

And above all else I hope you know that I love you.  And that this whole thing put me in an awful situation, where there was no right choice.

So I hope you forgive the choice that I made.

She didn’t invite them because she didn’t like them. It was a simple logic and yet it had taken her 19 years to figure it out- you don’t have to hang out with people you don’t like.